Lord Of The Rings: 10 Funniest Quotes From The Trilogy

Summary

• Gandalf’s humor shines through when he jokes about being late – a classic moment filled with laughter.
• Bilbo’s witty burn on the Hobbits at his birthday party is a clever and cheeky line worth remembering.
• Pippin’s innocent inquiry about pints of ale brings a lighthearted touch to the otherwise serious journey.

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While Peter Jackson’s legendary award-winning trilogy is known more for its epic battles and moments of heroism, there are many funny The Lord of the Rings quotes that add levity to the grand tale. Whether it’s the ever-proud dwarf Gimli, the hobbit duo Merry and Pippin, or even the ancient and inquisitive Ent Treebeard, many characters in Lord of the Rings have lines that break up the otherwise serious story with moments of humor – many of which are unique to the movies and don’t feature in J.R.R. Tolkien’s original novels.

Lord of the Rings may depict a grueling journey and several battles, but the trilogy is also known for its humorous quotes that are often heartfelt and reflect the characters’ personalities and relationships. From Gandalf’s view of Wizards’ lateness to Sam’s explanation about potatoes, there’s no shortage of unforgettable quotes from the movies that are still just as funny today as they were when the films released in the early 2000s. The funniest Lord of the Rings quotes stand as some of the best lines in Peter Jackson’s trilogy, and many are easily the ones that fans remember most when looking back on the epic saga.

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10 “A Wizard Is Never Late, Frodo Baggins.”

Gandalf The Grey (Ian McKellen) In The Fellowship Of The Ring

Gandalf may be one of the most stoic and serious characters in Lord of the Rings (not to mention the most powerful), but his first lines in The Fellowship of the Ring are, somewhat ironically, some of the funniest in the entire trilogy. The first time Gandalf is shown entering the Shire, an air of mystery surrounds him. His cheery nature is soon revealed thanks to Frodo’s pointed statement as he approaches Gandalf, sternly reminding him that he’s late.

This prompts one of Gandalf’s most memorable quotes, as he firmly reminds Frodo that “a Wizard is never late, nor is he early,” as “he arrives precisely when he means to.” Their uproarious laughter and tight hug that follows soon signal to fans that Gandalf was only joking. It’s a heartwarming exchange that will have viewers laughing along with the two characters, who still have a lot of catching up to do.

9 “I Like Less Than Half Of You Half As Well As You Deserve.”

Bilbo Baggins (Ian Holm) In The Fellowship Of The Ring

Hobbits are the source of many of the funniest Lord of the Rings quotes, with many attributed to Merry and Pippin. However, the duo don’t have a monopoly on the trilogy’s most hilarious lines to stem from the mouths of Shirefolk, with Frodo’s uncle Bilbo also spouting some incredibly funny dialogue. On Bilbo’s 111th birthday, the Hobbits throw a grand party fit for the adventurous and well-respected character. Everyone looks forward to his speech, with several parts of it sounding like half-meant jokes.

The shady burn doesn’t get the credit it deserves, as it’s a witty quote by the tired old Hobbit.

This is especially true for Bilbo’s remark about how he doesn’t “know half of” the Hobbits “half as well as” he “should like,” but he admits he likes “less than half of” them “half as well” they deserve. Only Gandalf and Frodo seem amused by the cheeky line, which resulted in an awkward silence that encouraged Bilbo to reach for the Ring. The shady burn doesn’t get the credit it deserves, as it’s a witty quote by the tired old Hobbit.

8 “It Comes In Pints?”

Pippin (Billy Boyd) In The Fellowship Of The Ring

The four Hobbits in the Fellowship — Frodo, Sam, Merry, and Pippin — are truly out of their comfort zone the moment they leave the Shire. However, while Sam may find the world beyond the home he knows overwhelming, Merry and Pippin relish what the rest of Middle-earth has to offer. One of the funniest Lord of the Rings quotes comes when they learn how alcohol is served in towns where everyone is twice their size.

When the Hobbits finally make it to the Prancing Pony inn, they’re disappointed to learn that Gandalf isn’t there. They share a few drinks and a proper meal, with Pippin being particularly interested in Merry’s tall drink. When Pippin asks Merry what it is and discovers it’s “a pint,” he comically asks “it comes in pints?” before sprinting to the bar. The hilarious quote from Pippin provides some much-needed comic relief, especially as the naive remark and the ensuing laughter don’t last very long, though, as Pippin soon makes one of the many mistakes that endanger Frodo’s life.

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7 “We Dwarves Are Natural Sprinters.”

Gimli (John Rhys Davies) In The Two Towers

There are many Gimli quotes that rank among the funniest lines in Lord of the Rings, and one of the best of these comes in The Lord of the Rings: THe Two Towers. When Legolas, Aragorn, and Gimli agree to pursue the band of Uruk-hai that took Merry and Pippin, none of them likely expected it to be “three days and nights pursuit,” especially not Gimli.

The Dwarf has a difficult time keeping up with his more agile companions, which he expresses in a comedic way

The Dwarf has a difficult time keeping up with his more agile companions, which he expresses in a comedic way by saying he’s “wasted on cross-country” and that “Dwarves are natural sprinters.” The gut-busting line is made even better by his side comment about how he’s “very dangerous over short distances.” He perseveres for the sake of his friends anyway, which underscores how tough and strong Gimli really is.

6 “Would You Like Me To Find You A Box?”

Legolas (Orlando Bloom) In The Two Towers

Legolas doesn’t immediately spring to mind when thinking of funny characters from the Lord of the Rings trilogy, but the elf played by Orlando Bloom slyly has some of the most hilarious quotes — especially when it comes to his conversations with Gimli. While it may have started out as a rivalry, Legolas and Gimli develop a genuine friendship that neither of them likely expected. Their hurtful insults towards each other soon turned into playful banter, which is precisely what happens during the battle in Helm’s Deep.

When Gimli asks “what’s happening out there,” Legolas has a scathing response — the Elf asks Gimli if he’d like him to “describe it” for him or to just find a box he can stand on. The side-splitting dialogue is exactly the kind of comic relief that the tense sequence needs.

5 “What About Second Breakfast?”

Pippin (Billy Boyd) In The Fellowship Of The Ring

The idea of “second breakfast” has become a meme in the decades since Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring was released, and Pippin’s incredulity that Aragorn has no concept of the mid-morning meal still stands as one of the funniest Lord of the Rings quotes. On their way to Rivendell, the Hobbits pause to prepare their food, which causes Aragorn to turn back and remind them that they “do not stop till nightfall.”

Hobbits sure do love food, and Pippin is beyond disappointed to learn it isn’t a priority on their journey.

Pippin is confused by Aragorn’s response that they’ve already eaten and asks “what about second breakfast.” The relatable quote becomes even funnier when he asks about all the other meals Hobbits usually have, which include “elevenses,” “luncheon,” “afternoon tea,” “dinner,” and “supper.” Hobbits sure do love food, and Pippin is beyond disappointed to learn it isn’t a priority on their journey.

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4 “I Feel Something, A Slight Tingle In My Fingers.”

Legolas (Orlando Bloom) In The Two Towers

Legolas’ reaction to alcohol makes for one of the funniest Lord of the Rings quotes and, like many involving the elf, is part of a scene with his best friend Gimli. When Gimli makes the mistake of challenging Legolas to “a drinking game,” he learns the Elves don’t have the same kind of metabolism of other races in Middle-earth, including Dwarfs (who themselves are known to enjoy more than a few drinks).

Gimli is later seen barely able to form a full sentence while sitting in front of a pile of empty mugs, while Legolas excitedly comments about “a slight tingle” in his fingers. His genuine joy at the thought of the liquor “affecting” him makes the wildly entertaining scene even better. It’s also a meme-worthy moment that the fandom has shared and discussed countless times since then.

3 “We Only Just Finished Saying Good Morning.”

Treebeard (John Rhys-Davies) In The Two Towers

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The Ents may be among the most powerful beings in Middle-earth, but it can be frustrating to deal with them at times. However, their peculiar mannerisms and entirely different perception of the world also makes for some of the funniest Lord of the Rings quotes, with Treebeard being one of the most hilarious characters in the trilogy. A particularly funny line comes when it emerges just how long it takes the sentient trees to communicate with one another.

Merry and Pippin learn firsthand exactly how long it takes “to say anything in Old Entish,” which is especially inconvenient when a battle is about to take place.

Merry and Pippin learn firsthand exactly how long it takes “to say anything in Old Entish,” which is especially inconvenient when a battle is about to take place. When they finally confront the Ents who have been talking for hours, they expect a decision, but Treebeard just slowly recounts how they “finished saying good morning.” The amusing quote is irritating to hear for the Hobbits at that moment, as they know their friends’ lives are at stake.

2 “That Still Only Counts As One!”

Gimli (John Rhys-Davies) In The Return Of The King

Gimli and Legolas’ competitiveness is taken to a whole new level in The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King during the battle of the Pelennor Fields, as they both still insist on besting each other’s kill count. This friendly competition, much like many aspects of Gimli and Legolas’ friendship, results in one of the funniest Lord of the Rings quotes — one that stands out all the more for taking place in one of the most epic battles in the trilogy.

At one point, Legolas takes down an entire Olpihant on his own, and the awe-struck Gimli can do nothing else but declare “that still only counts as one.” The silly statement results in a laugh-out-loud moment that underscores the ridiculous and seemingly impossible feat Legolas has just accomplished. Everyone knows that definitely counts as more than one, but, knowing Legolas, he likely honored Gimli’s request.

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1 “Po-tay-toes! Boil ‘Em, Mash ‘Em, Stick ‘Em In A Stew!”

Samwise Gamgee (Sean Astin) In The Two Towers

Of all the funny Lord of the Rings quotes, Samwise Gamgee explaining the finer points of Hobbit cuisine the a disgusted Gollum easily stands out as the most hilarious. The interactions between Sam and Gollum are already strained by the time the Hobbit decides to cook some wild rabbits instead of feeding them to Frodo raw (like Gollum wanted). Sam remarks that their stew would be much better with “a few good taters,” and is then enraged by Gollum’s questions – “what’s taters?”

It’s made all the funnier due to Sam’s thick UK West Country accent.

Sam’s hilarious response spells it out for Gollum, who has long forgotten what potatoes are. His humorous outburst speaks volumes about how sick and tired he is of being away from the Shire, and what he’d be willing to give to taste simple potatoes (or strawberries) once more. It’s made all the funnier due to Sam’s thick UK West Country accent, with his over-enunciated phonetic spelling out of “po-tay-toes” being one Lord of the Rings line that many fans find impossible to forget.

The Lord of the Rings

The Lord of the Rings is a multimedia franchise consisting of several movies and a TV show released by Amazon titled The Lord of the Rings: The Rings of Power. The franchise is based on J.R.R. Tolkien’s book series that began in 1954 with The Fellowship of the Ring. The Lord of the Rings saw mainstream popularity with Peter Jackson’s The Lord of the Rings and The Hobbit trilogies.

Movie(s) The Lord of the Rings (1978) , The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring , The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers , The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King , The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey , The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug , The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies , The Lord of The Rings: The War of The Rohirrim Created by J.R.R. Tolkien First Film The Lord of the Rings (1978) Cast Norman Bird , Anthony Daniels , Elijah Wood , Ian McKellen , Liv Tyler , Viggo Mortensen , Sean Astin , Cate Blanchett , John Rhys-Davies , Billy Boyd , Dominic Monaghan , Orlando Bloom , Christopher Lee , Hugo Weaving , Sean Bean , Ian Holm , Andy Serkis , Brad Dourif , Karl Urban , Martin Freeman , Richard Armitage , James Nesbitt , Ken Stott , Benedict Cumberbatch , Evangeline Lilly , Lee Pace , Luke Evans , Morfydd Clark , Mike Wood , Ismael Cruz Cordova , Charlie Vickers , Markella Kavenagh , Megan Richards , Sara Zwangobani , Daniel Weyman , Cynthia Addai-Robinson , Lenny Henry , Brian Cox , Shaun Dooley , Miranda Otto , Bilal Hasna , Benjamin Wainwright , Luke Pasqualino , Christopher Guard , William Squire , Michael Scholes , John Hurt TV Show(s) The Lord of the Rings: The Rings of Power Character(s) Frodo Baggins , Gandalf , Legolas , Boromir , Sauron , Gollum , Samwise Gamgee , Pippin Took , Celeborn , Aragorn , Galadriel , Bilbo Baggins , Saruman , Aldor , Wormtongue , Thorin Oakenshield , Balin Dwalin , Bifur , Bofur , Bombur , Fili , Kili , Oin , Gloin , Nori , Dori , Ori , Tauriel , King Thranduil , Smaug , Radagast , Arondir , Nori Brandyfoot , Poppy Proudfellow , Marigold Brandyfoot , Queen Regent Míriel , Sadoc Burrows

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