10 Funniest Jokes In Beetlejuice Beetlejuice

Warning: This article contains SPOILERS for Beetlejuice Beetlejuice!

Beetlejuice Beetlejuice is chock-full of hilarious jokes, bits, and quotes that will keep the audience laughing until the end credits roll. The Tim Burton sequel brings together three generations of Deetz women as they return to the Maitland House in Winter River, Vermont. The Beetlejuice 2 characters soon go on a wild adventure when Astrid gets caught up in a villainous teen ghost’s plan.

Like Beetlejuice, the sequel defies genre rules by blending together comedy, horror, and fantasy. Whether the characters are traversing the Neitherworld and afterlife or going through a funeral, there’s no shortage of quippy dialogue and wordplay to keep viewers engaged. However, some of the jokes rise above the rest in terms of memorability and hilariousness, making them the best of the entire movie.

Characters With The Funniest Jokes

Delia Deetz

Betelgeuse

Rory

Charles Deetz

Wolf Jackson

Astrid Deetz

10 “I’ve Lost My Horny Handyman.”

–Delia Deetz To Astrid Deetz And The Rest Of Her School

Catherine O'Hara as Delia Deetz at a funeral in Beetlejuice 2 Image via Universal Pictures

Throughout Beetlejuice Beetlejuice, the funniest character by far is Delia Deetz, the dramatic and snarky artist played by the enigmatic Catherine O’Hara. She has little to no filter or awareness about how she impacts those around her in the original movie. This part of her personality is further displayed in the sequel when she tells Astrid about Charles’ death. She laughably crosses all social boundaries, announcing the death by screaming it in front of Astrid’s entire school.

The situation gets even funnier because of the words she says. She says Lydia left her “papa,” Astrid lost her grandpa, and “I’ve lost my horny handyman.” Her phrasing is wildly inappropriate to share with a school full of teenagers who don’t need to know about her sexual role-playing. She especially shouldn’t be sharing this information in front of her granddaughter who gets teased by her classmates.

9 Betelgeuse As A Couple’s Therapist

Betelgeuse Talking To Lydia And Rory In The Model

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Aside from Delia Deetz, the character with the best one-liners and comedic bits is the titular main character of Beetlejuice Beetlejuice. A great example is the couple’s therapist scene, where he acts as the mediator for Rory and Lydia. He uses constant wordplay to further his horror. He asks them to spill his guts, an idiom for disclosing information. Then, he literally spills his guts, having them burst out of his abdomen.

Michael Keaton in Beetlejuice 2 with creepy hands over this shoulders Related 25 Beetlejuice Beetlejuice Easter Eggs & References Explained

Beetlejuice 2 embraces nostalgia by staying true to the original movie, but the various Easter eggs and references also lean into modern day.

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Betelgeuse then says they need to get in touch with their inner child, a phrase used in therapy to refer to a part of someone that acts and feels like a child. When the “ghost with the most” says his inner child will be around soon, he makes Lydia’s abdomen expand until Beetlejuice Beetlejuice’s horrifying new version of Betelgeuse – Baby Betelgeuse – bursts out. This is one of the cleverest examples of comedy in the movie because it relies on words and phrases having multiple meanings.

8 “Long-Distance Relationships Can Be Hard, Especially When One Of You Is Dead, And The Other Is Ignoring You For 30 Years.”

–Betelgeuse To Bob In The Afterlife Call Center Office

A picture frame with Lydia's picture as a young girl on Beetlejuice's desk in Beetlejuice 2

Based on the premise of Beetlejuice Beetlejuice, the audience knew that Lydia would be coming back into contact with the demonic, pervy bio-exorcist who once made her life a living hell. Given the 36-year gap between Beetlejuice and Beetlejuice 2, it was unclear whether the two would have had any contact before the events of the sequel. The movie answers this question when Lydia starts seeing flashes of the “ghost with the most” caused by him psychically reaching out to him.

When Betelgeuse explains his efforts to Bob, he delivers a line that perfectly demonstrates his delusional mentality: “Long distance relationships can be hard, especially when one of you is dead, and the other is ignoring you for 30 years.” The general sentiment of long-distance being challenging is relatable. However, as a whole, the quote is unhinged. It humorously highlights his fixation on the teen he tried to trick into marriage, romanticizing their dynamic by calling it a long-distance relationship.

7 Rory’s Poem About Charles’ Death

Rory Talking To Astrid At The Wake

Justin Theroux as Rory looks shocked in Beetlejuice Beetlejuice

One of the most hilarious moments in Beetlejuice Beetlejuice occurs early in the movie when Rory tries to connect with Astrid. Despite her obviously brushing him off, he doesn’t know when to stop. He starts going on about how loss can bring families together, lying about writing a poem about Charles on the way to the funeral. Rather than brushing off his blatant lie, Astrid calls him out by asking him what the poem was about.

What follows is a comical attempt to cover up a lie, resulting in a cringe-worthy yet entertaining scene that might be painful for viewers who experience secondhand embarrassment. He stumbles over his words, claiming the poem is about grief and then acceptance. Ultimately, this moment shows how much of a faker and fool Rory is, foreshadowing his lies to Delia – revealed at the end of Beetlejuice Beetlejuice – in one of the most amusing ways.

6 “My name is Charles Deetz. I’m feeling a little lightheaded.”

–Charles Deetz To The Dry Cleaner

Jeffrey Jones as Charles looking upwards uneasily in Beetlejuice

The events of Beetlejuice Beetlejuice center on Charles Deetz’s death, so it is a surprise when a version of the character (not played by Jeffrey Jones) appears onscreen. The movie reveals that the family patriarch died after being eaten by a shark. When he shows up in the Neitherworld, his top half is removed with serrated edges from the shark’s teeth. He’s squirting blood from his spinal cord on his bottom half. He then delivers one of the funniest jokes in Beetlejuice Beetlejuice: “My Name is Charles Deetz. I’m feeling a little lightheaded.”

Jeffrey Jones as Charles in Beetlejuice with Beetlejuice 2 imagery in background Related Why Jeffrey Jones Doesn’t Return As Charles Deetz In Beetlejuice 2

Though Beetlejuice 2 features several members of the Deetz family, Jeffrey Jones’ Charles won’t be one of them, and it’s for an understandable reason.

Like other jokes in the sequel, this quote relies on wordplay. Where lightheaded generally means faint and dizzy, he means it literally. He’s lacking his entire top half. Ultimately, it’s fitting that one of Charles Deetz’s only lines in Beetlejuice Beetlejuice is a dad joke that’s as laughable as it is groan-worthy.

5 Wolf Jackson’s Cue Cards During His Inspiring Speech

Wolf Jackson Talking To The Afterlife Officers

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Most of the jokes in Beetlejuice Beetlejuice come in the form of witty, scathing lines said at just the right time to elicit laughs, but one of the funniest moments occurs entirely through visuals. After calling the ghoul squad to chase down Betelgeuse and Lydia, Wolf Jackson gives an impassioned speech meant to inspire them. However, eagle-eyed viewers will notice a woman standing behind the officers, hilariously holding up cue cards with the words that Wolf Jackson is saying. Apparently, he’s incapable of doing anything without being fed lines.

This scene pokes fun at method actors whose characters become their entire personality. Despite receiving lines, Wolf Jackson has forgotten that he’s an actor, not a detective. There’s also a second layer to this humor because Beetlejuice Beetlejuice is making fun of people in the entertainment business while being made by people in the entertainment business. The meta aspect makes this joke even more genius.

4 “Oh My God, It’s You. I Thought A Moose Was Going To Attack Me.”

–Delia Deetz To Lydia Deetz

Delia Deetz (Catherine O'Hara) with her eyes wide about to scream in Beetlejuice 2

Throughout the original Beetlejuice, Delia Deetz makes snarky remarks about the people and things around her, but they aren’t as frequent because she isn’t a lead character. Luckily, the character gets a more central role in Beetlejuice Beetlejuice, offering up plenty of hilarious insults to keep audiences laughing. The perfect example of her funny lines is her response when she hears Lydia doing breathing exercises. She says, “Oh good, it’s you. I thought a moose was going to attack me.

Delia’s flair for the dramatic and her artsy side allows her to say things in a memorable and laughable way.

Coming from any other character, the angry moose comparison would be just plain mean, but Delia’s phrasing, inflection, and facial expression make it hilarious, too. Moreover, few characters would phrase that sentiment the way she did. Anyone else might have just said, “What’s that terrible sound?” or “Stop making that sound.” However, Delia’s flair for the dramatic and her artsy side allows her to say things in a memorable and laughable way.

3 “Where’s That Obnoxious Little Goth Girl Who Tormented Me All Those Years Ago? It’s Time To Find Her.”

–Delia Deetz To Lydia Deetz

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One of the funniest jokes in Beetlejuice Beetlejuice harkens back to Delia and Lydia’s volatile relationship throughout the first movie. Lydia and Delia never had a positive dynamic, with the stepdaughter resenting the stepmother and the stepmother finding the stepdaughter insufferable. Despite the pair having a better relationship in the sequel, Delia repeatedly brings up how terrible and difficult Lydia was as a teenager.

As such, it feels perfect when she says, “Where’s that obnoxious little goth girl who tormented me all those years ago? It’s time to find her.” The statement is equal parts funny, inspiring, and insulting – all of which fit with Delia’s personality. The fact that she’s encouraging Lydia to go back to her personality also shows a secret respect and admiration that Delia holds for Lydia, making the joke sentimental, too.

2 “Your Work’s Gonna Go Up In Value.”

–Astrid Deetz To Delia Deetz

Jenna Ortega as Astrid looking scared in Beetlejuice Beetlejuice

For a movie that blends together horror and comedy, Beetlejuice Beetlejuice has surprisingly few moments of gallows humor – jokes that make light of serious and painful situations. Most of the jokes fall into the categories of wordplay or snarky remarks. However, Astrid makes perfect use of this type of comedy at the end of the sequel when Delia is taken away to the Neitherworld.

Astrid points out to Delia that her death isn’t a complete loss, because her art will increase in value. In conventional humor, this joke would be seen as entirely inappropriate. Someone’s death doesn’t need an upside. Still, the Beetlejuice 2 joke fits in perfectly with the Deetz family’s macabre sensibilities and offers a small amount of tension relief during a sad scene. It also provides a little joy to Delia, a stereotypical egotistical artist, as she leaves her family.

1 “I Think It Was Dostoevsky Who Said, ‘Later, F*cker.’”

–Betelgeuse To Jeremy

Beetlejuice (Michael Keaton) as a train conductor in Beetlejuice Beetlejuice

The funniest moment in Beetlejuice Beetlejuice occurs at the movie’s climax when the “ghost with the most” stops Jeremy from taking Astrid’s soul. Rather than stopping him in a conventional way, Betelgeuse pretends to be a Neitherworld immigration employee, even wearing the uniform and hat. He gives the homicidal teen ghost a moment of hope by stamping the passport. However, he follows it up with the hilarious quote: “I think it was Dostoevsky who said, ‘Later, F*cker,’” which he says while sending Jeremy into a fiery pit.

There’s just something gratifying and amusing about hearing profanity within the same sentence as Dostoevsky’s name.

Since the movie is rated PG-13, this is the only instance of an unbleeped F-word in the film, and it’s perfect. There’s just something gratifying and amusing about hearing profanity within the same sentence as Dostoevsky’s name. The Beetlejuice 2 quote defies the idea that curse words are the antithesis of intelligence, showing how the two can go hand-in-hand.

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PG-13ComedySupernaturalFantasyHorror

Director Tim Burton Release Date September 6, 2024 Studio(s) KatzSmith Productions , Tim Burton Productions , Warner Bros. Pictures , Plan B Entertainment Distributor(s) Warner Bros. Pictures Writers Alfred Gough , Miles Millar , Mike Vukadinovich , Seth Grahame-Smith , Michael McDowell , Larry Wilson Cast Michael Keaton , Jenna Ortega , Winona Ryder , Monica Bellucci , Willem Dafoe , Justin Theroux , Catherine O’Hara Runtime 104 Minutes Main Genre Comedy Expand